Candlelight vigil puts a spotlight on domestic violence victims forcibly silenced

By Frances Ruth Harris
MILFORD — Caring advocates covered Milford with purple ribbons, highlighting the need to recognize victims and survivors of domestic violence and face its horrors.
Safe Haven held its candlelight vigil for victims and survivors on Oct. 25, amid rates of abuse that are spiriling upward.
"Safe Haven served 369 victims for an average of 31 new victims every month," Executive Director Christina Byrne told the Courier. These numbers are for Pike County alone.
It gets worse. From July 1 through Sept. 30 of this year, she said, "Safe Haven served 160 victims for an average of 53 new victims per month. This is a 71 percent increase in the number of victims served."
These grim figures do not necessarily mean there is more abuse, but that more cases are being reported.
"I attribute this increase to Safe Haven’s greatly enhanced community outreach efforts, which entails a ‘boots on the ground’ campaign to ensure that Pike County residents in all corners of the county — particularly the more rural areas, are aware of and can easily access Safe Haven’s services," Byrne said.
From Jan. 1 through Sept. 30, Safe Haven has served 224 victims of domestic violence, an average of 6 new domestic violence victims every week, she said.
The vigil also shone a light on those who have been forcibly silenced.
The event included guest speakers Janine Gulla and Yvonne Accomasso, musician Christopher Gebiya, and the Dingman Delaware Children's Choir, which began the evening singing in Hebrew, "Truth, Justice, Peace." Singing in English, the choir continued with, "Somewhere Over the Rainbow."
Gulla and Accomasso spoke with the passion of experience, accumulated over years, tormented by their abusers. After they finally were able to see the monster in their lives, they could act on their own behalf.
Each individual tells a unique story, they said.
They said now they see themselves as surviving warriors, ready to help others suffering under the dead;ly smothering blanket of domestic violence.
How to get protectionBryne and outreach advocate Chelsea Falotico both stressed domestic violence facts:
Every 60 seconds, 24 women are victims of intimate partner violence.
Every day, three or more women are murdered by their boyfriends or husbands.
Every month, the National Domestic Violence Hotline receives an average of 22,000 calls.
Every year, over twelve million women and men are victims of intimate partner violence.
One in three women and one in four men have experienced domestic violence.
Christopher Gebiya played the flute as participants, many dressed in purple, held candles during a time of quiet remembrance. Tiny purple iced cupcakes and a variety of cookies decorated a table. Safe Haven gave away free stress balls and pens with their logo and phone number.
Safe Haven teaches victims how to file for a Protection from Abuse Order (PFA). The court document provides protection to victims (and sometimes their children) for up to three years. The PFA orders describes what an abuser can and can't do. Criminal consequences can follow if the abuser violates the PFA.
PFAs are available from the courthouse or Safe Haven's office, 402 Broad Street in Milford. A temporary PFA may be granted by a judge followed by a hearing. Safe Haven advocates are ready to help victims fill out a PFA.
Safe Haven says, "Be a part of the solution! Volunteer with Safe Haven! Call Chelsea for more information on our free advocate training and other ways that you can support out cause. No one deserves to be a victim. If someone is abusing you, it's not your fault. If you or someone you know is a victim of domestic violence, sexual assault or any other serious crime, call our 24-hour hotline today to reach a live advocate. 570-296-HELP (4357)."